Adam and Eve both had issues with placing blame on someone else for what they had done themselves. Eve blamed the serpent and Adam blamed Eve. (Gen. 3) Why is it so difficult for us to just take responsibility for our own actions?
The truth is that in any relationship if we all start sharing the blame it makes it harder for the devil to divide us. Sharing the responsibility for a senseless indiscretion can draw you closer than ever to one another. For instance, one day I was exhausted and frustrated with the trials of motherhood. When Joseph arrived home from work I kissed him goodbye and quietly exited the house for some alone time.
When I arrived back at home I discovered that the homework that our son was working on when I left didn’t get finished. I quickly became agitated because I felt like it was Joseph’s responsibility to make sure that it was finished. When I questioned Joseph as to why he hadn’t made sure that our son completed it. He responded, “I didn’t know he had any homework.” It was clear to both of us at that moment that this conversation could go either way. I could blame him for not asking the right questions and he could blame me for not telling him that our son still had homework to finish. So we looked each other in the eyes and smiled. I said, “Yeah I guess I should have told you honey.” He responded, “No baby. I should have asked.” 🙂 This is what we call in our house “defusing an enemy attack.”
Next time you find yourself in a situation in which you want to blame your spouse for something try to defuse the enemies attack by looking your spouse in the eyes, smile, and share the blame.
We promise you’ll be glad you did. Married is good! As the old saying goes, “Don’t sweat the small stuff.”