Hello everyone! I’m Joseph (most people call me Joe) and I’m Cassandra’s husband. I will be a guest author on Marriage is Good from time to time. What Cassandra said is true, marriage is good and our marriage is forever! We agree that it’s still a work in progress but we’re committed to improving ourselves individually under God to make our marriage sweeter! I truly love my wife and she is driven, independent, committed and multi-talented! She knows her purpose and what God has called her to do. I support that, but for a marriage to be good both parties have to be happy. Well, I’m here to confirm we are both happy with each other! LOL!
Statistics show that 50% of first marriages end in divorce. Statistics also show that 50% of Christian marriages will end in divorce also! Why is this so? Well, I believe one of the major reasons is carnal Christians. Let’s look at a definition for carnal- not spiritual; merely human; temporal; worldly. I highlighted worldly because Christian couples tend to think and act worldly when troubles arise in their marriages. Saints use excuses such as we grew apart, we realized we had too many differences, we can’t live together anymore. The world way says leave when issues arise, but God says “condemn them through me and I will equip you with the weaponry needed.” 2 Corinthians 10:4 states, “For the weapons of our warfare are not carnal, but mighty through God to the pulling down of strong holds.” This scripture is saying that our weapons are not “fleshly” but spiritual. We have a spiritual weapon that can be mightily used through God to defeat and destroy any attack on our marriage. When we use worldly weapons to fix a marital problem you are in danger of eventually being spiritually defeated.
Let me back up a moment. Someone is probably saying to me “Can a Christian be carnal?” and the answer is YES! 1 Corinthians 3:1-3, the apostle Paul is addressing the Christians and states in verse 3: “For where there are envy, strife and divisions among you, are you not carnal and behaving like mere men?” When Christians are on the brink of divorcing is there not division and strife in the household? Do we not think selfishly when there are children involved in a marriage, yet we feel we would be better off alone? We all are with sin and every time we sin we are acting carnally. We are to instead perfect our walk with God and ask him to lead us through temptation and deliver us from our sins. We have to ask God to change our way of thinking and give us the spiritual weapons needed to destroy and defeat any attack on our marriage.
Saints what we’re doing wrong is we’re not applying God’s word to every area in our marriage. I know many Christian couples who are tithers, faithful Sunday worshippers and they even went through marriage counseling before they got married. Yet their marriages still ended in divorce! Why? They were not doers of the word in their marriages. They did not die to self so they reacted carnally (worldly)! Saints this is a covenant we form with God and we took an oath to be there in good or bad times, sickness or health until death do us apart! We choose to ignore this when we’re disagreeing with each other. We forget that our spouse is not the enemy but a vessel being used by the devil to separate us because he simply hates marriage because God created it. Christian couples often forget that God is the 3rd party in their marriages. We’re so quick to point out our spouses issues but won’t evaluate ourselves and what we need to fix to have a better marriage. Why do we forget God’s word when our marriage is under attack? God says all things are possible to whom that believe. This means our marriages can stay in heavenly bliss if we trust in God. You are a Christian now so your carnal way of thinking has been replaced with a spiritual way of thinking apply it!
If you’re going through a difficult time in your marriage and you want to get it back on track. Please take the first step and die to self. Don’t let pride and egos stand in the way of what God has planned for your marriage. Even if you’re not the one who initiated the wrong someone has to die to self first in order for God to step in and work it out. Jesus died for us! He gave of himself first so that we may live. You gave of yourself when you became a Christian to live for God. Remember, you now have a new way of thinking and belief system. This does not apply in certain areas of your life but in ALL areas so believe and trust in God’s word and continue to pray for your spouse and your marriage. Build your faith through prayer and studying the word. Apply his word to every area of your life. Stop being a carnal Christian and claim the victory in your marriage! I’ll be praying for you and remember God’s word when trouble attacks. Marriage is good even in bad times.